JOKES

 IHI NG TAO

Ang ihi pag matamis, may diabetes ka.

Pag maalat, may kidney trouble ka.

Pag maasim, acidic ka.

Pero pag ininom mo, may brain problem ka.

KNOCK KNOCK muna.

 

Ay Dyusko! Ay dyusko to say I love you, Ay dyusko to say how much I care. (I JUST CALLED TO SAY I LOVE YOU-Stevie Wonder)

Phone na Nokia. Phone na Nokia, di sinasadya. Di kayang magtapat ang puso ko.

Kamuning. Kamuning get me, get me, get me. Baby i’m yours. Kaamuning get me.

Russian Patay. Wise men say, only fools Russian, patay can’t help, fallin in love with you.

Terminal. Terminal..every now and then i get a little bit lonely.. (TOTAL ECLIPSE OF THE HEART)

Alfred. Alfred my wings and i learned how to fly..

Bumili ng bagong folding bed. Bumili ng bagong folding bed (MAD AT YOU- Neyo).

Pikachu. No, I don’t wanna go to bed (pikachu). (MAD AT YOU- Neyo)

Fire, apoy. If fire apoy, I think I could understand. (IF I WERE A BOY- Beyonce)

River boat. River boat young when I first saw you. I close my eyes. (LOVE STORY- Taylor Swift)

Lady Gaga. Kung Lady Gaga ka.. sa piling ng iba..

Para, Mamang Taxi. I’m your biggest fan, I’ll follow you until you love me. Para, mamang taxi. (PAPARAZZI- Lady Gaga)

Nido Gatas. I Nido boo, gatas see you boo.. and the hearts all over the world tonight. said the hearts all over the world tonight.

I-autoload mo ako. How much? Magkano? Nothing’s gonna change my love for you, i-autoload mo ko. how much? magkano?

Soon to Open: Pan de Manila. Uno, dos, tres, soon to open Pan de Manila.

Pritong Saba, Pritong Mani, Sinigang, Kare-kare. Pritong saba, pritong mani, sinigang, kare-kare. Hallelu— Hallelujah.

Tagabitbit Putobumbong. Tagabitbit. Tagabitbit. Tagabet bet bet bet bet. Putobumbong. putobumbong. Putobumbong.

Kabag Again. Now i’m speechless, over the edge of this breathless. I never thought that I would catch this, the kabag again.

Melon, Kangkong, Mais, Gulaman, Talong. Melon kangkang mais gulaman. Maari bang mag-talong?

Medicine. Bayang magiliw.. medi-cine.

Kinurot ko. Kinurut-kurot ko pa. Kinurot ko. Kinurut-kurot ko pa. (intro – always be my baby – mariah)

The Hill and Cow. The hill and cow ang sigaw ng puso ko. Ikaw ang nasa isip ko.

 

Honda. Honda first day of Christmas, my true love sent to me.

Honda ulit! Honda wings of love! Up and above the clouds the only way to fly, is Honda Wings of Love.

Pacquiao. But it’s over now. Come on and take Pacquiaooo.

Lasengga. All lasengga ladies. All lasengga ladies. Put your hands up!

Twenty-one. 7 + 7 + 7.. Twenty-one.. 7 x 7 x 7, yan ang hindi ko alam!

BDO. Watch me on your BDO Phone. BDO phone.

Dina Bonnevie, Gary V. Dina Bonnevie my lover, Gary V with my friends.

Lactum. I Lactum move it move it!

Pulis may wang-wang. Pulis may wang-wang-wang! Shorty fire burning on the dance floor. Ooh~

Tuna Pie. Tuna pie, tuna limit, tuna wall~ for a chance to be with you i’d rather risk it all. Tuna pie, tuna fever come what may! ~

China. Chinaaa~ ika’y muling makita ko. Damhin ang tibok ng puso mo.

Buko Shake. Voulez buko shake avec moi ce soir. Voulez buko shake avec moi ye ye ye ye.

Mighty Mouse. Mighty mouse outside Chicago. Can’t stop driving I don’t know why~